Our Daughter

Just before Lily started Kindergarten, Bayo and I sat down with her to chat about some things she might face because she is adopted. I was concerned that she might get some uncomfortable questions about skin color in our family, especially because she is a different color than her brothers.

I said, "Lily, if your classmates ask you why your mom is white and your dad is black, what will you tell them?"

She responded, "Because they were born that way!"

How refreshing. We brought it up because we thought her classmates might wonder why she's black like her dad and not brown like her brothers. But it looks like she'll be able to hold her own with any questions people throw her way.

Or maybe most people just won't notice the color variation of our children. Case in point:

Recently I was chatting with a friend who moved to Jos about a year ago. I mentioned that we would appreciate her prayers for Lily to get a visa. She looked confused as she said, "But she's your daughter so of course she should be able to travel with you."

I said, "Yes, she's our daughter, but she's adopted and we still need to complete her U.S. adoption."

My friend had no idea. I was quite tickled that she hadn't noticed the color variation of our children.

Lily is aware that she is adopted. We've been very open about it. But now we've come to a point where we're intentionally not going to talk about it--unless she brings it up. She is simply our daughter, no labels attached.